If you’re dealing with lower back pain that’s putting a damper on your sex life, you’re definitely not alone. Loads of folks go through this, and it can throw a curveball in the bedroom fun.
But guess what? Certain positions can ease that pesky lower back pain and make your time between the sheets even more enjoyable. Rachel Sommer, our clinical sexologist and sex expert made a list of the best sex positions for lower back pain for you to try! Let’s check out what her suggestions are:
Table Of Contents
Understanding Lower Back Pain
Lower back pain can be a real pain in the butt, and it can seriously affect your healthy sex life. According to some peer-reviewed studies, chronic pain in the lower back is one of the most common health problems in the world having 4 out of 5 people worrying about it [1]. But what causes it?
Lower back pain comes from a bunch of different things. It might be due to disc problems, like a herniated disc, or it could just be the usual wear and tear from daily life. It’s pretty common, but definitely a pain to deal with. Although it is not a sexual disability, it could affect the sexual function of a person. You might also want to think twice about morning sex. You see when you first roll out of bed, your spinal discs are squeezed tight and under the most pressure they’ll experience all day.
When it comes to sexual activity, a lower back pain patient can have a hard time finding the best position that is comfortable for them. If you’re usually the top partner or the penetrative partner, you might need to make slight adjustments to avoid severe pain.
For example, if you have forward-bending intolerance that makes your back scream ‘nope’, then you’ll want to skip any sex positions that need too much of that. And if bending backward is like a big red stop sign for your back (you know, that whole flexion motion intolerance or others might call extension intolerant), then you’re better off avoiding those moves. It’s all about finding a suitable position that works for you and your partner. But if push comes to shove, you can take some pain reliever before sex.
1. Missionary
Ah, good old missionary! Perfect for keeping things hot in your sex lives without straining your back. In fact, according to a multicenter retrospective analysis [2], it’s one of the safest positions for people with low back pain.
One of the benefits of the missionary position is that it allows you to keep your back in a neutral pose avoiding pain during sex. It keeps your spinal movement less during sex, which is great news if you’re motion intolerant. You can also use a rolled towel or pillow under your lower back for extra support.
How To Do It
- Start by lying on your back with a pillow or rolled-up towel under your lower back for support.
- The penetrative partner can then straddle you and enter you from above.
- Make sure you’re both comfortable and able to communicate throughout the experience. If something doesn’t feel right, speak up and adjust as needed.
- Slow and steady wins the race, especially when you’re dealing with back pain.
- Start with gentle thrusts and work your way up to a pace that feels good for both of you.
- If you’re at the receiving end, try wrapping your legs around your partner’s waist for added support. This can help take some of the pressure off your lower back.
- You might find that slightly adjusting your leg or hip position can make all the difference in your everyday health, comfort, and pleasure.
2. Doggy Style
If you’re the receiving partner and you experience pain when bending forward too much or perhaps sitting for long periods, doggy style might be a great option for you. You can support yourself with your hands and knees, taking the pressure off your lower back. Plus, your partner can grab onto your hips for added support and control.
On the other hand, if you’re a penetrating partner and experiencing back pain, doggy style might not be the best choice. It can be tough to keep good posture and control when your spine moves a lot. This often leads to more pain and discomfort in your back. In this case, consider other doggy positions first, and when worse comes to worst, you can ditch it altogether.
How To Do It
- Get on all fours. Yes, you heard us right. Get down on your hands and knees and arch your back. This will help take the pressure off your lower back and make doggy style more comfortable.
- Have your partner enter you from behind. This is where the fun begins. Your partner can use their hands to guide themselves in and out, or they can grab onto your hips for extra leverage.
- Depending on your height and your partner’s height, you may need to adjust the angle of your hips to get the right fit.
- Use pillows for support. If you’re still feeling some discomfort in your lower back, try using pillows to prop yourself up and take some of the pressure off.
- You can put a pillow under your chest or your hips, depending on what feels best.
3. Cowgirl
If lower back pain’s a hassle for you, try taking the top spot next time you’re getting intimate. The cowgirl position is cool because you get to call the shots on how deep or fast things go, and you can shift around until you hit a sweet spot that doesn’t hurt. When you’re in charge up there, you can lean in, lean back, or just sit straight – just mess around with it until it feels right. You might find leaning forward a bit tough on your back, but leaning back could be just the ticket to reduce pain.
And hey, if you start to feel pain while on top, switch up how your partner’s lying. They can stretch out flat or sit up a bit, like against a headboard. Tweaking their position a bit can really ease up the pressure on your back and make the whole experience way more fun.
How To Do It
- Kick-off by lying flat on your back and have your partner climb on top, facing your feet. If your lower back needs a bit of a boost, just slip a pillow or a rolled-up towel under it.
- As your partner begins to lower themselves onto you, use your hands to support their hips and guide them into position.
- Once they’re in position, you can use your hands to guide their movements or place your hands on their hips for support.
- Experiment with different angles and movements to find what feels best for both you and your partner. Remember, communication is key!
4. Spooning
Spooning is quite similar to the “side-by-side” position, but it involves the penetrating partner lying on their side behind the other person. It’s a classic position for couples because of how romantic and hot it is, but is it good for your back? According to a study by the University of Waterloo [3], spooning sex positions is not always the best option for those with back pain. However, don’t despair just yet. With a couple of tweaks, it can still be comfortable for both you and your partner.
Tucking a pillow under your knees can take some of the pressure off your lower back. This little change can make spooning way more comfy for both of you. Instead of lying flat on your side, try shifting a bit so you’re almost on your back, but at a slight angle. This little move can cut down on the back strain and make spooning a lot more chill.
How To Do It
- Lie on your side with your partner behind you, also lying on their side. Your partner should be the big spoon, with their arms wrapped around you.
- Bend your knees slightly and bring them up toward your chest. This will help take pressure off your lower back.
- Use pillows to prop yourself up and make sure you’re comfortable. You can place a pillow between your legs for added support.
- Begin with gentle movements and slowly build up intensity. Communicate with your partner about what feels good and what doesn’t.
- Try different variations of spooning to find what works best for you. You can try adjusting the angle of your legs or changing the position of your arms.
5. Lap Dance
This position is perfect for couples who want to add a bit of fun to their sexual activities. To get started, have your partner sit on a chair or the edge of the bed with their feet on the ground. You’ll then straddle them, facing away, and lower yourself onto their lap. Make sure to keep your feet on the ground for balance and support. Lap dance is great for people with lower back pain because it allows you to control the depth and angle of penetration. Plus, the chair or bed provides extra support for your partner’s back.
How To Do It
- First, have your partner sit on a chair or the edge of the bed. You’ll want to straddle them facing away, with your feet on the ground.
- Slowly lower yourself onto your partner’s lap, keeping your back straight. Use your hands to support yourself as you lower down.
- Once you’re comfortable, start to move your hips back and forth, grinding against your partner’s lap.
- You can also lean forward and use your hands to touch your partner’s body.
- To spice things up even more, try adding in some grinding or lap dancing movements to really get your partner going.
- Don’t forget to communicate with your partner throughout the experience. Let them know if something feels uncomfortable or if anything makes the pain worse so you can try something different.
6. Laying Doggy (Facedown)
If you’re dealing with lower back pain, the Laying Doggy (Facedown) position might be the perfect solution for you. This variant position of the doggy is great because it keeps your spine in a neutral position, reducing the risk of spinal flexion and discomfort.
One of the great things about facedown is that it allows for deep penetration while still being comfortable for both partners. Plus, it’s a great option for those who find other doggy-style positions to be too strenuous on their lower back.
How To Do It
- First, lay down on your stomach with your legs straight out behind you.
- Have your partner straddle your legs and enter you from behind.
- Use a pillow or cushion under your hips to help elevate them and relieve pressure off your lower back.
- You can also try placing a pillow under your chest to help support your upper body and make the position more comfortable.
- From here, you can experiment with different angles and movements to find what feels best for you and your partner.
Wrapping Up
Hopefully, you have these sex positions for back pain helpful and of course, make sex enjoyable once again. Remember, different positions work for different people, so don’t be afraid to experiment and find what works best for you.
If lower back pain is a bummer and you’re usually on the receiving end, think about positions where you’re in the driver’s seat with the depth and speed, like cowgirl or reverse cowgirl. These let you take a bit of the body weight off your partner. For those who are more on the giving side, consider something where you can give your partner’s lower back a little extra love, like missionary with a pillow under their hips, or good ol’ spooning. These can help prevent pain and make things feel better for them.
If you have chronic back pain or have had back surgery, it’s important to communicate with your partner about what feels comfortable and what doesn’t. Remember, sex should be enjoyable for both partners, and there’s no shame in taking breaks or switching positions if something doesn’t feel right.
Finally, if you’re interested in anal sex, remember that it’s important to be extra cautious and take things slow. Backward bending positions may be uncomfortable for pain patients, so consider positions where you can lie flat or on your side. And as always, don’t forget to use plenty of lube and communicate with your partner about what feels good.
Rachel
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