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This is an article for people who identify as women, people who identify as men, and everyone in between. All of us have anuses, and all of us can enjoy anal masturbation. Anal orgasms are democratic (that’s with a lower-case “d”) in that they are available to everyone regardless of sex, gender, or orientation.
It is true that anal orgasms often have more of a learning curve than penile or clitoral orgasms, but most people who can achieve them report that they are intensely pleasurable. Keep reading if you are interested in learning more!
Table Of Contents
What Is Anal Masturbation?
Anal masturbation is when you stimulate the anus and the surrounding area, which is rich with nerve endings and therefore very sensitive. Anal masturbation can include sex toys designed for anal use. We are not the anal masturbation police, however, and if you wish to incorporate additional stimulation (genitals, nipples, etc.), you absolutely should!
Why Should I Masturbate Anally?
The benefits of masturbating anally are the same as any other sort of masturbation. As our friends at the Sexual Medicine Society of North America report, masturbation contributes positively to:
- Stress reduction: masturbation and orgasm release “feel-good” hormones such as dopamine, endorphins, and oxytocin.
- Improved sleep: masturbation may make it easier to fall asleep and sleep more soundly.
- Sexual satisfaction: learning your own desires and responses can greatly improve partnered sex.
- Pelvic floor health: orgasm contractions can strengthen muscles that impact sexual functioning, bladder control, and bowel control.
- Mood elevation: masturbation is a kind of self-care that can alleviate symptoms of anxiety and depression.
As for why you should experiment (or continue) with anal masturbation, the anus, anal canal, and surrounding area have a high concentration of nerve endings. This can make stimulation very pleasurable.
In addition, people with prostates often enjoy prostate and perineum stimulation, and people with G-spots and A-spots can experience indirect stimulation through the (thin) wall that separates the vagina from the anus.
Does Anal Masturbation Hurt?
Anal masturbation should not hurt, especially if you prepare yourself and work up to penetration. Some discomfort is not unexpected; however, please listen to your body’s signals and stop if you feel actual pain. You can always start back up again if you decide that you’re ready to proceed.
Some common causes of pain during anal play (and how to avoid them) include:
- Too Fast, Too Hard: Especially for folks who are new to this kind of play, it’s important to start out slowly and gently; this may mean fingers instead of sex toys in the beginning.
- Not Enough Lube: The anus does not produce any natural lubrication, so you will need plenty of good-quality lube.
- Tense Muscles: If you’re feeling nervous or apprehensive, your muscles will clench involuntarily. Try a warm bath and/or your favorite adult beverage to relax and loosen up.
Additional suggestions from our sex educators, testers, and reviewers:
- Foreplay Matters: Foreplay makes sex better, even when it’s just you and yourself. Take time to touch your body, including your bottom.
- So Does Using the Right Toys: Sex toys designed for anal use have a flared or wide base so that they don’t get sucked inside your body. If you think that won’t happen to you, well, these folks probably did too.
- Listen to Your Body: Pain that you do not want or expect is a signal that something is wrong. Stop immediately to evaluate the situation.
Can I Orgasm From Anal Masturbation?
Just like some folks don’t orgasm from oral sex and some don’t orgasm from penetrative sex, not everyone will be able to orgasm from anal masturbation. That’s just the body lottery. But you won’t know until you try, and even if you don’t orgasm, anal stimulation still feels good for most bodies (and of course, you can always choose to orgasm a different way).
As we explained earlier, the anus and surrounding tissues are full of nerve endings, which makes the area sensitive and receptive to pleasure. Anal masturbation usually also includes prostate stimulation for folks who have these, and G-spot/A-spot stimulation for folks with those parts.
Anal Masturbation Methods
Outside of safety (which includes only using body-friendly sex toys with wide or flared bases) or consent (which doesn’t usually apply to masturbation) issues, there’s no wrong way to have sex. But if you are new to anal play and don’t know where or how to get started, the sex educators on staff have some suggestions:
1. Use Your Fingers
Fingers are a really good way to get started with butt stuff. Most of us have them readily available and they won’t get stuck. Make sure that your hands are clean and that your nails are short and smooth.
If you are concerned (about cleanliness or anything else), you can purchase thin disposable surgical-style gloves: make sure to either choose latex-free gloves or use lube that is compatible with latex.
2. Try Anal Beads
Anal beads are usually graduated in size, which means that you can start at the small end and gradually work up to whatever you are comfortable with. The beads typically have a handle so that after insertion, you can either thrust the bead stalk to simulate penetration or masturbate another way and pull the beads out when you are approaching orgasm. As with all anal toys, you’ll want to use plenty of lube.
3. Check Out Butt Plugs
Butt plugs come in many different shapes, sizes, materials, and functionalities, so you are sure to find one or more that suit you. Beginners can start with slender, tapered plugs to get used to the sensation and “train” their sphincter muscles to accept penetration. This training can happen during masturbation or other sexual activity, but you can also simply insert a small butt plug and go about your day while your body gets used to the feeling.
Some butt plugs vibrate. Some people like this a lot, and some find that it’s too much of a good thing. If you think that you’d be one who likes it, make sure to start out low and slow. We also recommend short sessions at first while you learn how your body reacts to getting shaken and stirred.
Any sex toy that is used internally should be produced from body-friendly materials and should be waterproof so that it can be thoroughly cleaned. We recommend medical-grade silicone, stainless steel, or borosilicate glass. If you’re looking for a vibrating butt plug, silicone is the best option. Stay away from “jelly” toys, even if you like the idea of a softer material back there, because they cannot be adequately sanitized.
4. Explore Prostate Massagers
The prostate is exclusive to people with penises. It’s a small walnut-shaped gland that sits inside the anus, in front of the rectum and below the bladder. Most people with prostates find stimulation very pleasurable, and some can reach orgasm this way. A prostate orgasm may or may not include ejaculation or even an erection.
Prostate massager toys tend to be shorter than dildos because they target the prostate, which is not very deep inside the anus, and they are usually curved. They vibrate, and some have other features such as thrusting, remote control, and more.
5. How About a Suction Cup Dildo?
First things first, in case you are concerned: you are expected to suction-cup the dildo to a surface, not to you! This is a good option for people who enjoy the feel and rhythm of penetrative anal sex. You can attach your favorite dildo to a wall or shower wall and back yourself up onto it, or to the floor and lower yourself. This allows you to thrust hands-free, which means that you can use your hands to stimulate the rest of your body.
If you choose to play this way, make sure that you suction-cup your dildo to a very stable surface and not a piece of furniture that can topple over. If you don’t have a suction-cup dildo or a sturdy place to attach it, you could use a sex pillow with a sex toy mount to hold your dildo.
Safety Notes
For anal play, you should only consider sex toys that are designated for anal use. Not only are they produced with materials that are safe to go inside your body and can be thoroughly cleaned, but they will also have a wide/flared base.
Make sure to clean your anal sex toy before and after each use. And if you are a person with a vagina, you should never move a toy from your anus to your vagina unless it has been cleaned first (and let’s be honest, you probably don’t want to be running to the kitchen sink in the middle of your session).
Six Steps to Successful Anal Masturbation
Anal sex, or anal masturbation, can feel intimidating if it’s not something that you’ve done before (or done a lot of). We’re here to tell you that it’s just another way to enjoy your body! But we’re also here to walk you through the best ways to get ready to enjoy your body this way.
1. Cleanliness Is Happiness
You are probably plenty clean; most healthy people are. But we have been socialized to believe that our buttholes are dirty and gross (and there are some legitimate concerns about bacteria), so it’s difficult for many of us to relax and enjoy anal play because we think that we’re dirty and gross. So, let’s get ahead of that by tidying up down there.
If you can, try to move your bowels 30 to 60 minutes before your planned play session. Some people prefer to help this along with an enema or an anal douche.
Take a shower and/or wash your rear end with warm water and mild, fragrance-free soap. You can also use an unscented, pH-balanced feminine wash product (even if you do not identify as female, it’s just soap). If you have a bidet or bidet attachment, you can also use that.
2. Lube Is Your Friend
We write this in nearly every article, but it’s true. Most masturbation and partnered sex are improved by lube, but it’s essential for anal play since the anus does not naturally produce lubrication.
- Water-based lube is almost always a safe choice since it is compatible with all sex toys and rarely causes skin irritation, but it tends to dry up quickly so you should be prepared to reapply as needed.
- Oil-based lube (or body-friendly food-grade oils) is thicker; however, they are not safe to use with latex sex toys or latex gloves.
- Silicone lubes are delightfully slippery but incompatible with silicone sex toys, and many anal toys are wholly or partially.
3. Set the Mood
Mood matters for masturbation too! You deserve as much seduction as you would offer your lover
- Take a warm bath or shower to relax your body and pamper yourself.
- Set yourself up somewhere comfortable with soft, silky sheets and plenty of pillows.
- Put on your favorite music or adult content, light a scented candle, and get yourself ready in whatever way works best for you.
- Try some breathing exercises to connect with your body, reduce stress, and maximize oxygen delivery to your brain (the most important sex organ we have).
4. Start Slowly
There’s no need to jump in the deep end here. Whether you’re playing with yourself or with a partner, the anus usually needs some time and patience. You can caress and stimulate the rest of your body (including your genitals, not that you need our permission) to get the party started, which also relaxes your anus and makes you more receptive.
Apply lube to your body, your finger(s) of choice, and your sex toy. Start by circling your anal opening with your finger to get used to the sensation and also to check receptiveness. Insert your finger slowly and gently; if that feels good to you, you can go deeper, add another finger, or introduce your sex toy.
5. Experiment With Pace and Motion
Once you have comfortably penetrated your anus, you can try thrusting and/or rotating your toy. As above, start out slowly and gently, and work up to your preferred intensity. This penetration and stimulation may be enough to bring you to an anal orgasm.
6. Don’t Ignore Other Erogenous Zones
The focus of this article, and presumably your solo session, is on anal masturbation, but that’s no reason to ignore the other 99.97% of your body. Your genital and non-genital erogenous zones (penis, testicles, perineum, hips and thighs, nipples, clitoris, vagina) deserve some love too, and this will also increase your arousal and possibly contribute to your anal orgasm.
Best Anal Masturbation Positions
The best positions for anal masturbation depend on your body, your flexibility, and your preferences. We’re happy to share what our staff has identified as being generally popular (and successful); as always, take what works for you, customize it as you desire, and leave the rest.
1. Doggy-Style
Doggy-style is great for anal sex and also anal masturbation. This position opens up the hips and pelvis, which makes penetration easier. It also gives good access to the genital areas for additional stimulation.
Position yourself on your hands and knees. You can put a firm cushion under your hips for additional support. Reach your dominant hand towards your back end, use your fingers to explore your anal area, and add an anal sex toy when/if you are ready.
2. Missionary
In the classic missionary position, the receiving partner is on their back with their knees bent. This position also works very well for anal masturbation. It is generally comfortable and not very strenuous.
Lie on your back with your legs spread and your knees bent. We recommend a firm cushion under your hips for better access and a better angle. Reach your dominant hand towards your back end, use your fingers to explore your anal area, and add an anal sex toy when/if you are ready.
3. Spooning
Okay, it’s not really “spooning” when you’re the only spoon in the drawer, but most of us are familiar with the spooning position so it’s a convenient shorthand. This is also a very comfortable position and it’s well-suited for people who aren’t in the mood for gymnastics.
Lie on your side in a half-moon position with your legs slightly bent and your hips angled forward. You may be more comfortable with a small pillow between your knees. Reach your dominant hand towards your back end, use your fingers to explore your anal area, and add an anal sex toy when/if you are ready.
4. Prone (Face-Down)
This is the reverse of the missionary position, and people who get professional massages will probably find that it feels familiar. It works well for anal masturbation because you have full access to your bottom.
Lie face-down on the bed with your legs slightly spread. Use pillows to prop up your head for easy breathing, and your hips for support and a good angle. Reach your dominant hand towards your back end, use your fingers to explore your anal area, and add an anal sex toy when/if you are ready.
5. Cowgirl
In classic cowgirl, the receiving partner is on top and in control. This works best with a sex toy pillow with a dildo mount or a suction-cup dildo (see above). Make sure that your dildo is secure and stable!
Position yourself over your mounted dildo with your legs spread and knees slightly bent. Reach your dominant hand towards your back end, use your fingers to explore your anal area, and lower yourself onto the dildo when you are ready.
Aftercare
After your anal masturbation session comes aftercare for you and for your toys. Take some time to come down from the high, and then lube up your finger again and check your anal passages for abrasions or micro-tears. Soothe any minor irritations with coconut oil or aloe vera. (Anything more than a minor injury warrants a call to your health care provider, who has seen and heard it all before and will not be shocked that adults engage in adult recreational activities.) Then wash your hands thoroughly.
Next, check your toy for tears or other damage. If your anal sex toy is waterproof, and most toys produced by reputable manufacturers and sold at reputable retailers are these days, wash it in the sink with warm water and gentle fragrance-free soap. Pat it dry with a soft lint-free cloth and let it air-dry on a towel out of the sun before storing it away. If your toy cannot be washed in the sink, you can use a specialized sex toy cleaner or follow the manufacturer’s directions.
Happy vibing!
Maggie
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