Are you looking to bring some spark back into your relationship? Well, it’s not all about the moves; it’s about the connection. That’s why our clinical sexologist, Rachel Sommer, Ph.D., has put together a list of the top 10 intimate sex positions that help you get closer to your partner.
But before we dive in, here are some general tips on how to increase intimacy during sex:
- Try to savor every moment of the sexual intercourse. Make it more than just a way to achieve orgasm.
- Touch each other. Our bodies are unique, and you feel pleasure from just having your legs stroked.
- Talk to each other. Communication is hot, period. Don’t be afraid to tell your partner they’re doing a great job.
- Stay face-to-face as much as possible. Increase connection by maintaining eye contact.
Now, it’s time for some inspiration:
Table Of Contents
1. Spooning
The spooning position is much more than just a cuddle, and here’s why it’s our favorite intimate sex position:
- While wrapped in a comforting hug, your partner can easily access your erogenous zones. Imagine gentle strokes along your breasts and stimulating touches that elevate your pleasure. Yummy!
- Spooning brings both physical and emotional closeness, as your partner can stroke your hair or whisper sweet nothings, making you feel cherished and secure.
- It encourages a slower, more sensual pace, allowing you both to savor the moment and deepen your connection beyond just chasing an orgasm.
Pro Tip: Spooning is a good sex position for adding a sex toy. Try clitoral stimulation using a G-spot vibrator for heightened sensations.
How To Do It
- Both partners lie on a flat surface, facing the same direction.
- The vagina owner (little spoon) lifts their top leg and arches the back for easier entry by the big spoon.
2. Lotus
The lotus position is where magic happens. It’s very intimate because you wrap yourself around your partner as if you are one and gaze into each other’s eyes with all your senses ignited.
Lotus is also one of the top tantric sex positions. To make sex extra special, you can incorporate some tantra principles into the play. Tantric sex favors deliberate intercourse where the goal isn’t orgasm but a spiritual connection.
One technique is synchronizing your breathing. Start slow, deepen your breath, and focus on how your breaths merge.
How To Do It
- The penis owner sits cross-legged.
- The vulva owner sits on top and wraps their legs around their waist.
- You can hold onto his shoulders or neck.
3. Ballet Dancer
The ballet dancer position is a nod towards the art of dance, where the connection matters as much as technique. But you must synchronize your hip movement with your partner’s, or you’ll lose balance!
Similarly, it might take a lot of trial and error to find an angle that works best, but communicating with your partner strengthens your bond and makes the intercourse more intimate.
Once you’ve become more comfortable with the ballet dancer, you can make it even more intimate by keeping eye contact and kissing. If you’re in a committed relationship, this is also an excellent opportunity to express your feelings with words.
Don’t be afraid to whisper words of affirmation into their ear and tell them how much you care about them.
How To Do It
- Stand in front of each other.
- Raise one leg and wrap it around your partner’s hip.
- You can hold onto your partner’s shoulders or neck, and he can put his hands around your waist for more support.
4. The Hound
If you’re looking for a sex position that balances intimacy with intensity, the Hound might be perfect for you. It’s a twist on traditional doggy style, where the man leans forward, allowing him to stroke the woman’s breasts, adding an intimate touch to the passionate setup.
The Hound excels because it offers deep penetration, ideal for hitting the G-spot, while also allowing for tender actions like stroking your hair or kissing your neck. Although maintaining eye contact isn’t easy in this position, glancing over your shoulder to lock your eyes can heighten the excitement and intimacy, making the moment even more thrilling.
How To Do It
- Start on all fours with your knees together.
- Your partner then enters you from behind and leans forward so he can hold onto your chest.
- You can arch your back for deeper penetration.
5. Missionary With CAT
Missionary with CAT is a slight variation of the missionary position where the penetrating partner positions themselves a bit higher so they can rub the clitoris with their penis shaft. CAT refers to the coital alignment technique that aims to bring the penetrated partner to orgasm.
The movement in this sex position should be as slow as possible, translating into highly intimate sex.
Missionary might not win any awards for excitement, but it’s perfect for feeling close to your partner. Simply maintain eye contact and share gentle kisses. It’s not about deep penetration; it’s about deepening your connection, making every moment feel more intimate and meaningful.
While deep penetration isn’t on the table, deep connection certainly is.
How To Do It
- The bottom partner lies on their back with their legs slightly parted.
- The top partner climbs on top so his shoulders are somewhat above hers.
- He inserts the penis tip (or strap-on) and rests his weight on his partner’s body to increase friction.
6. The Lazy Man
In the lazy man position, the woman takes the lead, allowing for a more relaxed experience. This slower pace lets both partners savor each touch and gaze, enhancing mindfulness and connection. You can maintain eye contact, stroke each other’s hair, and hold each other close. For even more intimacy, try remaining still while rhythmically contracting your pelvic muscles, providing gentle stimulation while you both enjoy the slow burn.
Pro Tip: Stroke your partner’s legs or hair – men need affection, too.
How To Do It
- Have your partner sit with his legs straight.
- The receiving partner straddles him and holds onto his neck.
7. Carry Me
A big part of intimacy is feeling protected, and nothing triggers emotional safety more than being carried by your partner. This standing sex position can help you achieve a connection like no other for these simple reasons:
- It requires you to embrace each other. To keep balance, the male partner can bury his head in his female partner’s chest. You can’t get physically closer than that.
- Since it’s a face-to-face position, you can easily stare into each other’s eyes and exchange passionate kisses.
- The angle of the penetration will heighten your sensations. Nothing makes you feel closer to your partner than a good orgasm.
How To Do It
- Lie on the bed in a missionary position.
- Have your partner lean over and wrap your legs around his waist and your hands around his neck.
- The penetrating partner can then lift you into the position.
8. The Pretzel
The Pretzel is a romantic sex position where one partner lies on their side and the other kneels, straddling one of the bottom partner’s legs while the other leg rests on the kneeling partner’s hip. This position lets you look right into each other’s eyes and touch each other easily, making it intimate and special. You can hold each other, kiss, and feel close the whole time, which makes it more than just physical; it brings you closer together emotionally. This is perfect for couples who like feeling a deep emotional connection while physically intimate.
How To Do It
- Lie on your side and lift one leg.
- Your partner kneels before you and puts your leg over his hip.
9. Boss Chair
Intimacy is more than removing your clothes or hugging your partner when you’re having a bad day. It requires vulnerability, which is about letting your partner see you both figuratively and literally.
In the Boss Chair position, a woman performs oral sex on her partner. This setup means he’ll watch you the whole time, so staying comfortable is important. If you start feeling tired or uncomfortable, that’s completely normal. Just take breaks or adjust to maintain your comfort throughout the experience.
You can always switch things around and have your partner go down on you instead. Kneeling in front of a woman might make some men uncomfortable, but you should reassure your partner that being submissive is fun.
Pro Tip: Even though you can have sex while watching TV, don’t try to multitask. If you want to deepen your connection, it’s best to focus on each other entirely. It’s a vulnerable sex position, after all!
How To Do It
- The receiving partner sits in a chair.
- The giver kneels in front of them.
- Then, it’s time to switch positions!
10. Mutual Masturbation
If you want a deeper emotional connection with your partner, it’s important to understand and communicate your own needs. Therefore, masturbating together can be a powerful way to learn about your desires and show each other exactly how you like to be touched.
Mutual masturbation also gives you a chance to really notice each other’s responses, which can be harder during more spontaneous sex. Don’t hesitate to slow things down; making the experience more deliberate can enhance intimacy. Reaching orgasm shouldn’t be the main goal—just enjoy being in the moment together. This can make your time together feel even more romantic and connected.
You can find more female masturbation positions here.
Pro Tip: Don’t be afraid to add a sex toy to the play – it can help you explore what kind of stimulation works best for you.
How To Do It
- Sit or lie down beside each other in a comfortable sex position.
- Stimulate each other’s genitals while maintaining eye contact.
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