While everyone craves intimacy, people tend to focus on the physical aspect of sex, leading to unfulfillment and a lack of emotional satisfaction. Therefore, our clinical sexologist Rachel Sommer, Ph.D., has compiled a list of the 10 best intimate sex positions to help your relationship get its old spark back.
But before we dive in, here are some general tips on how to increase intimacy during sex:
- Try to savor every moment of the sexual intercourse. Make it more than just a way to achieve orgasm.
- Touch each other. Our bodies are unique, and you feel pleasure from just having your legs stroked.
- Talk to each other. Communication is hot, period. Don’t be afraid to tell your partner they’re doing a great job.
- Stay face to face as much as possible. Increase connection by maintaining eye contact.
Now, it’s time for some inspiration:
Pro Tip: All the love-making positions come with pictures and illustrations, so it’s easy to try them yourself in the bedroom.
Table Of Contents
1. Spooning
The Spooning position would probably occupy the number one spot if this were a competition. After all, it resembles a cuddling position. But here’s why it’s more intimate than you think:
- When your partner hugs you, he can easily access your erogenous zones and maximize your pleasure. He can stroke your breasts and stimulate your clitoris, making you feel well-cared for.
- This position offers proximity, meaning your partner can stroke your hair or whisper reassuring things into your ear. It might be extremely comforting, especially if sexual intercourse makes you feel self-conscious.
- The positioning position forces you to slow down and enjoy the process instead of focusing on reaching orgasm. It allows you to connect with your partner on a higher level.
Pro Tip: Spooning is a good position for adding a sex toy. Try clitoral stimulation using a G-spot vibrator for heightened sensations.
How To Do It
- Both partners lie on their sides on a flat surface, facing the same direction.
- The vagina owner (little spoon) lifts their top leg and arches the back for easier entry by the big spoon.
2. Lotus
The lotus position is where the magic happens. It’s one of the most intimate positions because you wrap yourself around your partner as if you are one and gaze into each other’s eyes with all your senses ignited. In addition, spooning allows you to easily adjust the angle of penetration and find the combination that gives you the most pleasure.
Lotus is also one of the top tantric sex positions. To make sex extra special, you can incorporate some tantra principles into the play. A Tantric sex position favors deliberate intercourse where the goal isn’t orgasm but a spiritual connection.
One of the techniques is synchronizing your breathing. Start slow: deepen your breath and focus on how your breaths merge.
How To Do It
- The penis owner sits cross-legged.
- The vulva owner sits on top and wraps their legs around their waist.
- You can hold onto his shoulders or neck.
3. Ballet Dancer
The ballet dancer position is a nod towards the art of dance, where the connection matters as much as technique. You have to make sure that you synchronize your hip movement with your partner’s, or you’ll lose balance!
Similarly, it might take a lot of trial and error to find an angle that works best but communicating with your partner strengthens your bond and makes the intercourse more intimate.
Once you’ve become more comfortable with this sex position, you can make it even more intimate by keeping eye contact and kissing. If you’re in a committed relationship, it’s also an excellent opportunity to express your feelings with words.
Don’t be afraid to whisper words of affirmation into his ear and tell him how much you care about him.
How To Do It
- Stand in front of each other.
- Raise one leg and wrap it around your partner’s hip.
- You can hold onto your partner’s shoulders or neck, and he can put his hands around your waist for more support.
4. The Hound
If you want to try intimate sex but can’t give up on the primal aspect, the Hound position should be up to your liking. Hound is a modified doggy-style position where the man leans forward and strokes the woman’s breasts, making it more intimate.
What makes this doggy style position special is the penetration depth, allowing him to hit your G-spot while being close enough to stroke your hair or kiss your neck.
While eye gazing might not be the most convenient in this position, you can always turn around and keep eye contact for a moment, enough to make him want more.
Pro Tip: It’s also the best position for trying anal sex, as skin-to-skin contact can put you at ease.
How To Do It
- Start on all fours with your knees together.
- Your partner then enters you from behind and leans forward so he can hold onto your chest.
- You can arch your back for deeper penetration.
5. Missionary With CAT
Missionary with CAT is a slight variation of the missionary position where a man positions himself a bit higher so he can rub the girl’s clitoris with his shaft. CAT refers to the coital alignment technique that aims to bring the female partner to orgasm.
The movement in this position is supposed to be as slow as possible, translating into highly intimate sex.
While missionary isn’t the most exciting sex position out there, it’s also an intimate position that allows you to maximize closeness with your partner. All you have to do is keep eye contact and exchange sensual kisses.
While deep penetration isn’t on the table, deep connection certainly is.
How To Do It
- The bottom partner lies on her back with legs slightly parted.
- The top partner climbs on top so his shoulders are somewhat above hers.
- He inserts the penis tip (or strap-on) and rests his weight on his partner’s body to increase friction.
6. The Lazy Man
The world of sex isn’t free of stereotypes. For example, many believe good sex should always be intense and passionate; ripping each other’s clothes off, throwing your partner against the bed, or quickie in the bathroom because you just can’t keep hands off each other.
As good as these scenarios sound, lazy sex can be appealing too.
As the name suggests, a woman does all the work in the lazy man position, which is why it’s one of the most intimate positions. The lazy man position favors slow movement, allowing you to be more mindful of each other’s pleasure than in other positions.
For example, you can look into each other’s eyes, stroke each others’ hair, and embrace each other. If you want to make it even more intimate, stay still and squeeze your pelvis muscles. This way, you can gently stimulate your partner while taking things slow.
Pro Tip: Stroke your partner’s legs or hair – men need affection too.
How To Do It
- Have your partner sit with his legs straight.
- The receiving partner straddles him and holds onto his neck.
7. Carry Me
A big part of intimacy is feeling protected, and nothing triggers emotional safety more than being carried by your partner. This standing sex position can help you achieve a connection like no other for these simple reasons:
- It requires you to embrace each other. To keep balance, the male partner can bury his head in his female partner’s chest. You can’t get physically closer than that.
- Since it’s a face-to-face position, you can easily stare into each other’s eyes and exchange passionate kisses.
- The angle of the penetration will heighten your sensations. Nothing makes you feel closer to your partner than a good orgasm.
How To Do It
- Lie on the bed in a missionary position.
- Have your partner lean over and wrap your legs around his waist and your hands around his neck.
- The penetrating partner can then lift you into the position.
8. The Pretzel
As you might have guessed from the previous romantic sex positions, eye contact matters a lot in intercourse. Gazing into your partner’s eyes can increase intimacy and make sex more enjoyable.
If you don’t believe me, please look at some recent studies. One study identified factors that contributed to female orgasm, and contrary to what you might think, a good technique isn’t high on the list. Instead, the key to climax is a woman’s relationship with her partner, including communication and emotional connection. [1]
So yes, eye contact can strengthen the emotional connection.
The pretzel position is like missionary, where you focus on your partner’s body and maintain physical closeness. At the same time, it’s more exciting because it lets you experiment with different angles and clitoral stimulations. You can also add a bit of choking to spice things up.
How To Do It
- Lie on your side and lift one leg.
- Your partner kneels in front of you and puts your leg over his hip.
9. Boss Chair
Intimacy is more than taking your clothes off or hugging your partner when you’re having a bad day. It requires vulnerability which is about letting your partner see you both figuratively and literally.
In the boss chair position, a woman gives oral sex to her partner. Hence, your guy will watch you throughout, and it’s your responsibility to make sure you’re feeling uncomfortable. For example, you might get tired at some point, and that’s totally ok.
You can always switch things around and have your partner go down on you instead. Kneeling in front of a woman might make some men uncomfortable, but you should reassure your partner that being submissive is fun.
Pro Tip: Even though you can have sex in this position while watching TV, don’t try to multitask. If you want to deepen your connection, it’s best to focus on each other entirely. It’s a vulnerable position, after all!
How To Do It
- The receiving partner sits in a chair.
- The giver kneels in front of them.
- Then it’s time to switch positions!
10. Mutual Masturbation
If you want to connect with your partner emotionally, you have to take care of your needs as much as theirs. Masturbation can help you discover these needs and teach your partner how you want to be touched.
While it’s challenging to be fully present if you have sex in the heat of the moment, mutual masturbation allows you to focus on each other’s reactions.
Don’t be afraid of slowing things down if you want to make it even more meaningful. Orgasm shouldn’t be the goal, and you can stay connected in the moment and enjoy the process. It’s very romantic!
You can find more female masturbation positions here.
Pro Tip: Don’t be afraid to add a sex toy to the play – it can help you explore what kind of stimulation works best for you.
How To Do It
- Sit or lie down beside each other in a comfortable sex position.
- Stimulate each other’s genitals while maintaining eye contact.
The Takeaway
I hope you enjoyed this guide on the most intimate sex positions that can create a strong bond for couples.
Intimacy in bed is crucial because it doesn’t just improve your sex life but strengthens your relationship as well. While the positions on this list can help, the key is changing your attitude and focusing more on the intercourse itself than on orgasm.
Try to make your partner feel special, and you’ll find that sex is more fulfilling than before!
I hope you enjoyed my list of sensual sex positions.
Rachel
References:
[1] https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5087699/
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